THE DIFFERENCE: WHEN A HUSBAND IN A RESTAURANT IS WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND AND HIS WIFE.

1. Girlfriend decides to use her hands rather than the cutlery.
   HIS RESPONSE: Cool! I was about to suggest the same thing! Find it easier to eat, you know sweetie? Smart idea.
   The wife decides to use her hands rather than the cutlery.
   HIS RESPONSE: Mwaona! That’s why I don’t take you out! Unisebanya manje. Niya bwanji iyo. Na banthu bayanganako sure? Buti zoona iwe!!
2. Girlfriend orders a glass of red wine.
   HIS RESPONSE: Waiter, in fact just bring her the whole bottle, it’s fine; ‘ll sort it out!
   The wife orders a glass of red wine.
   HIS RESPONSE: Hmm…Elo muyambe kuchoka ma rash!! Mwani che coca cola apa. Elo na ndiyo mulibe ku nyumba mufuna ku Shaina pa banthu!
3. Girlfriend decides to go to the ladies.
   HIS RESPONSE: (stands up), Take your time baby. I’ll be right here when you come back. Can I get you anything else meanwhile…another bottle of wine?
   The wife decides to go to the ladies.
   HIS RESPONSE: (still seated), Noti chimpwena uko ka? Elo nikutunda fast, fast! So ngati ndiwe wayamba manje vo tunda tunda!! Ine kuzonda so!!!
4. Girlfriend decides to have her leftovers packed to take home.
   HIS RESPONSE: Waiter!!! Please pack her a fresh pack of the same order. Not this one!! Add on some salads as well. (turns to girl), You ok baby?
   The wife decides to have her leftover packed to take home.
   HIS RESPONSE: Ndiye ku wonoga VA kudya uku so!! Why did you order so much and yet you knew that you were not going to finish? Elo mailo tikakusiyani ati we are bad husbands!!! Waiter, balongeloko fast!!
5. Girlfriend decides she wants a fruit salad from the buffet table.
   HIS RESPONSE: Don’t get up!! I’ll get it for you, sweetie. Can I add on lots of cake? You sure??
   The wife decides she wants a fruit salad from the buffet table.
   HIS RESPONSE: Amake Michael! Simukuta? Koma ku nyumba kandolo iliko sure? Muzatulula navo VA kudya ka? Muzizibwelamo vinangu! Vilekeni che!
6. Girlfriend decides she wants to go home now.
   HIS RESPONSE: What? You’re kidding me, right? I wanted to take you out to dance a bit. Come on baby, do it for me…please??
   The wife decides she wants to go home now.
   HIS RESPONSE: Ine niyembekeza iwe so apa!! Ungo wayawaya mwamene wayambila sure! Ni kwabene Kuno. Tiyeni tikagone. Kwafipa!!!
7. Girlfriend wants to be kissed goodnight.
   HIS RESPONSE: Thought you’d never ask!! Bring those pretty sweet lips here!!
   The wife wants to be kissed goodnight.
   HIS RESPONSE: (turns to look at her with bewilderment), Ndiye vi chani ivo? Mwakolewa? Ka goneni chabe!